Thanksgiving Edition: A small update, list of thanks, a short story, and more talk about my future. 

Hi Family/Friends, 

I hope all of you had a wonderful Thanksgiving. I’ve been hiding out as you can tell. It was the first weekend I’ve had off since August, so I basically did nothing…but fall deeply in love with PBS once again, listen to podcasts (I’m such a junkie), and slept a lot.

Friday I closed a chapter in my life: I am no longer working my second job where I have to go all the way up to Ulmerton. (Thank Goodness.) After our boat show this weekend, I will be working full time in the boating industry again, and I’ll be about 10 minutes away from the rest of my world with a flexible schedule. Before I left that job though, the boss said, “Do what you love.” So it was a great goodbye and that door is closed forever….

I am super duper thankful for…. (not in any order) 

– all of my friends / family

– my new friends / family this year

– my family at gulfport community players

– reuniting with my favorite person

– a chance at being stage manager

– patrick’s writing class

– the moment that all of us theatre people do lunch/dinner every single time we get together for some event

– attending the star awards / being nominated

– all opportunities basically

– being coached for bsg

– my world of boating family who i haven’t talked to in ages

– just this week: reuniting with the pirate captain friend from years ago

– just this week: reuniting with another pirate friend from years ago

– eisenhower

– my theatre couch

– the moments that i can actually remember

– good books & bookstore 321

– pbs / npr

– podcasts

– all the shows i’ve been able to attend by audience or help with

– my love for all things

– jimmy buffett’s music

– all music. all theatre. my ability to write. all arts. everything.

– etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.

Story Time — DREAMS 

I’m going to tell you guys a secret. It’s a deep, dark secret that maybe hardly anyone knows about… when I was in middle school I was such a weird kid. My favorite music was classical—mostly Mozart—and I loved opera. When I got home from school, my radio went straight on NPR and I listened non stop. My weekends were scheduled to listen to: Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me, Prairie Home Companion, World Cafe, Car Talk and so on.

When I finally got a TV (whenever that was), I fell deeply for PBS. I watched all Great Performances, and anything else that was related to music and theatre. I used to religiously watch award shows like mad, and—when I thought I was going to be a music director at one point—I came up with a list of songs my choir would do and entrances/exits.etc.

(Now, remember all throughout my entire life I was also a bookworm and I constantly wrote.) 

This weekend I started watching PBS once again after a huge break, and I fell back in love with it again. I first watched In The Heights: Chasing Broadway Dreams. It’s basically a documentary that follows from when it was born to some of the practicing to the performance. It’s magic. I watched this full musical a while ago and it’s genius. I must say, it’s one of the first ones in present day since RENT that I really “got” and felt connected with. But to be a part of something like that—dreams coming true—absolutely wonderful and breathtaking just to watch/hear. To see the writer’s face when they were getting ready to perform… that… that is just something worth watching.

It’s just the feeling I get any time I am helping with a play. We work hard for the few weeks/months and then it’s show time. Cue the butterflies, the endless nights, the final day, the cast party and the goodbyes… all until the next show where you get to do it all over again just with a different script, different people, etc.  I told my former-former boss that’s how I want to live my life: work on a project for a while then it’s over, take a tiny break, and do the same with the next one…

I also found Noel Coward’s Present Laughter to be freaking genius. Everything that Patrick taught us in his writing class… it was in this play. No wasted dialogue. Characters are well developed, with a sense of purpose, and they made a difference each time they entered the room. Plus, it doesn’t hurt that I really want to live in the set design too. Watching this really helped me understand even more than I did before.

I’ve also caught up on some (not all) of the film shorts, some of the music documentaries, and I found another program “Black Folk Don’t…” It is such a wonderful show on black culture and everyone should be required to watch it. It’ll open your eyes to what you don’t know.

All of this watching and listening to podcasts that follow these shows or even short radio shows has me thinking about something. One of these days, I’m going to have to make a decision, and it’s going to be which path do I take from here? It’s a difficult one.

I find myself willing to admit (at this point) that I know deep down in my heart that I really belong to the arts world. I’m going to be that late bloomer (wrong word?)… the one that actually does this in the second half of her life, which is basically right now, I just need to do a little bit more towards this dream if I’m going to make it.

One day… I will be doing all the things — like maybe writing a play that could be produced on Broadway, being a big part of some show that could be at the Lincoln Stage, writing lyrics that could be performed by someone at Carnegie Hall, working with PBS/NPR on stories, finally write/finish The Office 2.0 & it being a big hit, or even attend jazz fest because I’ve actually had enough guts to do something with my love for it. Or even—more importantly—that dream of what I write in general gives people hope to never, ever forget their dreams and to always set large goals and hit them. That’s what I want. 

Eventually, I will be there. I’m working on it now. One… by one…

Before 2016, I had been so disconnected from my dream’s path but I believe it was meant for me to get that experience, to fully understand that I am on the wrong one, and make that decision on how to start earning money where I belong. Joining the Gulfport Community Players in 2016 was the first step towards crossing off one of my dreams…. do you want to know how many more followed after that? A lot, and almost all of them. All because I joined my theatre group did my dreams start coming true. Totally meant to be. I mean, life didn’t really exist beforehand… other than experience, don’t get me wrong…

I am seriously due for writing new dreams because that’s what’s wrong with me right now. I’m out of goals, and big picture dreams. While that’s a huge and wonderful accomplishment of checking a lot of them off, having my world so cloudy because I’m not focusing on what’s important, hasn’t been great for me….

Writing with purpose is the first goal, and everything else will follow. I know deep within my soul that my future is in the arts industry (writing, film, theatre, music, etc.etc.etc.) it’s just a matter of time when I will switch over, and what my journey will be when it happens.

– Karen Maeby 

Mind Probe Hypnosis [book review + thoughts] 

I started reading Mind Probe Hypnosis shortly after I bought it from the 321 Books in Tyrone Mall which was back in October and just now had the chance to finish it. Marvelous book, and really made me dig deep into my thoughts. I suddenly became philosophical again… something I haven’t tapped into for a while.

It was very well written with experience, scientific evidence and several parts where she writes out the conversations she has with these people who are troubled. I scribbled down some notes and thoughts and I’ll share those with you.

INCIDENTS 

This woman that was being hypnotized had many, many issues of pain to work through. These issues ended up being from the past lives to now where karma continued in a vicious circle and the same things just kept happening. Her mom became her daughter, father became her soul, a boy she liked ended up being her husband’s soul and an evil person that she was a slave to in a previous life ended up being her brother in her real life. She had four lives.

Woman has a constant headache, and didn’t know why. She went under hypnosis, and found out in her past life she was a male who was killed by a torture rack. The athlete who killed her as a male reminded her of her husband. Every time she was around her husband, she’d have that headache.

sharp object phobia — death by falling on a pitchfork

phobia of spiders — killed by one in former life

Girl’s mom and sister had babies at the same time. One died (mom’s baby) then she entered that baby’s body of the sisters.

Studies suggest that death was far more to look forward to than being born.

Male – froze when weather dipped below 70 degrees. Found out that in his past lives his life ended each time by freezing to death.

Female – couldn’t be around cats (allergic) – she got clawed very badly by cats in one life then in another she watched herself be eaten by a tiger.

There was a study that was done to someone who had never been sick in his life. Several of his friends and family started saying “you look sick, are you feeling well, etc.” to that person then he ended up getting really sick and going to the hospital. Once they stopped, he got better.

Reincarnation has to exist – unusual child prodigy’s (where do their talents come from) and the carrying over of skills. Plus, the recognition of others souls.

Go back to the origin of the problem—past lives to now.

Woman recognized someone in present day — she was both attracted to and repelled by this guy. She was married, however, he was very dependent on her and immature. The man deserted her, then she deserted her child (but that was not by choice). Man deserted her was the guy she was attracted/repelled by in present day and her husband represented her child she abandoned.

MY THOUGHTS 

Is hypnosis just another form of psychology? It is—after all—another instance of discussion with a therapist of some sorts—and without pills.

What if there are empty souls walking along the streets, and they can choose to go to someone who is freshly dead, become that person and die when they no longer want to fulfill roles of that one empty soul?

It makes me wonder if our past lives are reincarnated with souls that we’ve built karma with over time….until we finally break that pattern, then the souls go somewhere else.

The souls we’ve entangled ourselves with in present day has to be because of karma of our past lives. Do we love the same souls? Or because of which way our lives go….. good/bad do we get to be blessed to embrace those souls over and over again.

Why do our souls meet? For every purpose there is a reason.

There’s a reason for why someone leaves, and then comes back.

There’s a reason someone walks in their life and stays, or completely goes away.

There’s a reason we are where we are in life – at every given moment of every given day.

Then, there’s the strong connection—but what reasons with that?

What if all we needed to be is hypnotized to find out what our fears are and to get over them? To search deep within ourselves to find out what we were in a past life, and go from there to grow.

It’s a scary thought when you think that if someone was killed their soul is up walking around, or they might even come back as a murderer or be absolutely terrified of or knowing it was going to happen over and over and over again.

For every one born, another one dies. Souls are super exchanged.

Soul mates. Twin Flames. All of that exists…. just not enough people believe in it for it to happen.

What if hypnosis wasn’t even real, but whatever a person gets out of it is good enough to lose their fear or trouble that they had? I say that’s a winner.

And lastly, where do old souls—like me—come from?

-Karen Maeby

Letting Go of Phantom Tollbooth 

PHANTOM TOLLBOOTH

It’s really hard to believe that this past weekend was the end of Phantom Tollbooth, our first JRs production at the Back Door Theater (Gulfport Community Players).

After working backstage for several main stage shows {SOA’16, OTR, PAR, MODI, SOA’17), and really stepping up at Summer One Acts ’17 when J was gone, I was asked to be the stage manager of PTB. After some thought (and realization that I couldn’t work main stage because of my work schedule), I said yes to the JRs program, and I am really glad I did.

Since I had never heard of PTB before, I read through the script twice. Watched several versions on YouTube and then finally watched the movie. Sorry, but after seeing live performances, I could barely make it through the movie. I think I turned it off after 10 minutes.

In the time of this show, I had one absence due to the Tampa boat show and I felt like I missed a years worth of work. I got to put my creative (and scared) hand to work for designing some of the letters on the posters. I used what knowledge I had been given by J, and also learned a whole new set of things that I will use in future kid productions. I also watched in awe about how much some people can give and do for one show.

The biggest thing I learned was that the kids and adult shows are completely different. You never really know what’s going to happen with the kids… I’ve learned that the key to anything is practicing beginning to ending a few times… but given our situation (hurricane, timing for rehearsals during other uses, etc.) we really lost time to practice. So that was out of our hands, but I thought that Saturday’s show was amazing. At the very end Ms Director turned around to me and said, “Are you crying? That’s my job!” Oh yeah, I definitely was.

Anyone remember how emotional I was during the Summer One Acts of 2016? My first show ever with GCP after a 12 year absence of theatre? I think I knew at that point I had become involved in something so special that I would do anything and everything to continue. That’s how it felt at the end of Phantom. An ending to a beautiful and successful beginning.

Many of you know I’m not really a kid person, just because I’m not around them much, but these kids were awesome and they didn’t bother me at all. I really loved working with all of them, and getting to know some of the parents too. I don’t think I’ll ever forget this group, and I really hope I can work with all of them in the future… bright things are ahead for each and every one of them. I know that for sure.

PS: I am eventually going to write a play about the magic pencil. That thing was wicked cool.

PSS: WORDS WILL ALWAYS BE MORE IMPORTANT THAN NUMBERS. (Except for number 3, 7, and 13…. now you know where I stand. Ha!) 

LETTING GO 

It was really weird working a show that was coinciding with main stage, but I did get to watch it, luckily. Like I wrote on my Facebook page, I loved it. I loved it times a million zillion. The message was beautiful, and I knew that I was meant to be there at that very day just for the last song’s message. I loved the music and the lyrics and just everything about this original musical. I really do want the soundtrack. Oh and must mention one more time that B’s outfits were amazing. The whole thing was just beautiful. I really hope Letting Go makes it big.

Other things while I am here 

Holy cow it’s been busy.

  • I never reported on how awesome the writing class was from a while ago, but it was awesome.…. and I have another finished play, plus some exciting news when I can share.
  • Helped with Breaking the Code auditions. That was very fun, as always!
  • I was given a couch from the theatre (I practically asked the universe for this last year during Parfumerie when I fell in love with the set and wanted to take it home. Finally, it was my turn.) This couch is like magic… it’s the center of the room’s attention now. I’ve moved my entire place around just to suit it. It completes the place.
  • Finally went to a film society meeting after about 3-5 months.
  • I am leaving my 2nd job to become full time at the marine company at the end of this month.
  • My brand BoatShowGirl has been hit/miss the last few months… I’ve had some opportunities to pop up but haven’t had a chance to get to them yet. That’ll change soon.
  • I haven’t had the chance to work on my Pirate Gypsy Soul brand but look for it the next few months. There are several things I want to do—including finding my way of Wicca/etc, meditation, universe/dream boards, and studying/practicing/learning to be more of a clairvoyant psychic. I have jewelry projects that go along with this as well.
  • I’m also doing some serious gravitating towards becoming more 1920s gypsy pirate woman… wanting to dress like, the taste, the music, and just wanting to give up everything except that. It’s going to take a while, but there’s something magical about magick.
  • We’re gearing up for Peter Pan to start the first of December!
  • The St Pete Boat Show is also happening that same weekend. I’ll be there as BSG.
  • I’m sure there’s more, but I cannot think of them right now.

I hope all of you are doing good, and hopefully it won’t be months before I write again!

Love Always, 
Karen Maeby